I turn, though I am in heavy denial, the big 25 tomorrow, and given my tendency to reflect on everything everywhere all the time, I thought I’d share some lessons learned in the last year. It’s been a funny one, but a really very good one, if I look back on the whole year.
Despite people shouting “QUARTER OF A CENTURY” at me increasingly as tomorrow approaches, I’m feeling excited about 25, if 24 is anything to go by.
This is just a handful of things I’d tell myself this time last year if I could, not that I’d change a thing…
ONE. None of us are fucking up like we think we are. We’re always making progress even if we don’t feel like we are.
TWO. It’s not unhealthy to dwell a little, because that’s how you figure out what you think and what matters to you. That’s what opens your mind to new perspectives & helps you realise what you don’t want to do again. It’s what matures you. You should spend time dwelling, but not so much that you pass off chances to live & make new memories…and more shit to dwell over.
ONE. It is much better to wish that you hadn’t said something than to wish that you had & never know what the response would be. Just effing say it.
TWO. Stalking your ex/whoever has gripped your infatuation is like a virtual self-harm, as my bestie Becky discussed on the blog a few weeks ago. You are literally only hurting yourself & it’s completely unnecessary. You set yourself up for craziness. Becky is a heck of a writer so I recommend you have a read.
I confess, unapologetically, that I will most probably read every one of Laura Jane’s blogs/articles, fangirl over her #laurajanenaked and #lauradoesless hashtags on Instagram, and review any book she ever writes even if one day she pens a book on —–, because it would probably still be a good read.
I reviewed Laura Jane’s Becoming after I fell in love with it within a day back in October and I over-enthusiastically told anyone who would listen about it for a good three months. It taught me to appreciate break-ups as new beginnings, to enjoy being okay being on your own, and to be a better writer simply by being honest. So OF COURSE I was thrilled to hear she was writing another book. And of course I knew it was going to be something beautiful and brilliant when I heard the title Ice Cream for Breakfast.
Devoured within a day again. Dog-eared far too many pages. Even forced myself to do the 19 Things I Like About Myself list.
SO. A month or so ago I shared a post on my experience with coming off of the Pill after a reeeally long consistent use of it. I was fascinated by how my body reacted; it was like being a different woman. I had so many conversations about the Pill following the post; other women’s experiences with being on it and coming off it. It’s still an annoyingly taboo topic so I was glad to be able to really chat to women of all different ages, and it turns out, unsurprisingly but irritatingly, that not many of us reeeeally know what’s happening in our bodies when we’re taking the Pill, or how it’s going to react when we stop taking it (a little like your reaction when you’re dumped by text, for want of a better example). (more…)