On 26 Things To Do Before I Turn 26

I have always habitually used my birthdays as a time to set resolutions rather than the new year, although I confess to sliding a few in every January. I appreciate any time of year that serves as a kick up the ass. New ages seem more significant to me than a new year, so when my best friend Becky was telling me that for her mother’s birthday she was making her a list of 50 things to before she turned 50, I couldn’t help feeling like I needed me one of those for my upcoming geburtstag.

Questionable to be so inevitably turned on by lists of any kind.  (more…)

 
 

25 Things I’d Tell My 24 Year Old Self

I turn, though I am in heavy denial, the big 25 tomorrow, and given my tendency to reflect on everything everywhere all the time, I thought I’d share some lessons learned in the last year. It’s been a funny one, but a really very good one, if I look back on the whole year.
Despite people shouting “QUARTER OF A CENTURY” at me increasingly as tomorrow approaches, I’m feeling excited about 25, if 24 is anything to go by.

This is just a handful of things I’d tell myself this time last year if I could, not that I’d change a thing…



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What To Do If You Think You Think Too Much

I confess I am an over thinker only worsening with age. Though I perhaps try to worry less about things that are out of my control, though I care much less what anyone else thinks and though I’m content with how I’m going about life & have reached the blissful age of feeling no need or desire to justify my life to others, I still overanalyse the details and I still overthink situations to the point of regular frustration. I am physically incapable of not wanting to understand how a person sees things or what they meant by what they said, or even more personally, what I could have done differently and what I should have said (I for one am incredibly witty/convincing/charming AFTER a conversation).

Overthinking has its benefits. I am sometimes infuriatingly driven to understand people and love people and ‘get’ them in any way possible. Recently I found myself trying so hard to ‘get’ one particular person that the only person I really ‘got’ any better was myself. But for the most part, it lets me have the closest relationships and it lets me learn a great deal.

However. Undeniably, sometimes it’s a f**king pain in the ass to think so much. To not let a conversation or a situation just be. The majority of the girls I coach agree; perhaps that’s why coaching has its advantages; it allows you to overthink out loud. So I’m working on lessening the habit to a healthy point, where it’s good to think a little too much but not so much that your life becomes a pattern of Shoulda Woulda Coulda…because You Didn’t and going over it won’t achieve anything.

So how do we balance out our tendency to overthink? How do we, put bluntly, chill out a little bit?

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Why Do We Cling On To So Much Baggage?

I was having a long chat with a friend of mine recently. He won’t mind me sharing this. Because I’m not going to tell him.
He was sharing details on his latest array of maybes while I rolled my eyes but couldn’t help but relate because I’m undoubtedly as fussy as he is when it comes to who takes my fancy. He is, however, on another level. She’s too skinny. She’s got a funny nose. She talks too much. She’s a bit too sensitive.
And they all sound great to me. They’re all gorgeous and they all sound perfect for him. But he will always find a reason to keep his distance, usually once he’s already got ’em hooked. He will quietly admit that he has ‘commitment issues’; he had a shitty break-up a few years ago after the girl he adored cheated and took off. So I get it. I really do get it. I’m a little terrible with the ol’ trust issues myself; it only takes one person to teach you not to trust, but I am learning that only has to be true if we allow it.  (more…)

 
 

Get In The Water (Thoughts on Doing Tiny Scary Things)

I set myself a resolution, a goal of sorts, about a month ago…fuelled mostly by a short burst of insomnia which meant I was habitually journaling or book writing at 2am most nights, that consisted of doing 10 things that I was afraid to do. I think I’d read an article on “You must do the thing you think cannot do” or something. I was having a Kate phase.

So I formed a tired and slightly rushed list of 10 things that scared me/made me nervous that I had to get done by the end of the year. Earlier this month I ticked off what I’d call one of my ‘physical fears’; getting in the sea. I have an irrational childhood fear of the sea, as silly as it sounds, so it was a biggie for me to get in. It was a vodka shot, actually.  (more…)

 
 

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